A Mini-Me is on the way!
A baby - who will hopefully have my musicality and sense of humour, and it's dad's way with languages and words... (the horror would be my height and his nose!)

I am 11 weeks pregnant so far; I've had moments of morning (all day) sickness, some days of feeling like my body is re-wiring itself, a constant need for munchies (!), have started preferring tea rather than coffee (very wierd) and have gone off alcohol (tragic - even my beloved Port no longer appeals, and the smell of red wine makes me take a step back, not convenient when taking a Communion service I can tell you!). But really, I've been fine. Feel healthy, if a little tired, and perhaps not all my clothes fit as well as they did 2 months ago (!) but I feel good with this.

The baby was hoped for rather than a total suprise but, even with the certainty of being 11 weeks pregnant, I was still amazed when I saw the image on the scan. I really am pregnant, that really is a baby, and it really is happening to us, not just other people any more! Blimey!

So now the wonderful world of preparing for Maternity Leave begins - work: how does the Church of England handle this? As I live where I work from, how will I ensure privacy - and avoiding sidling my way back into work when I should be 'resting'?? Who's going to take my 18 weddings this year?

And never mind all that - others will cope fine without me. (sob - am I really dispensible?!) Will I be any good at this 'being a mum' thing? Will we make good parents? Will we bond with the baby, love him/her at first sight? If s/he is ill or has long term health needs, will we cope well? Will the baby be cute, or so ugly the midwife won't know which end to put the nappy.....?!

So if you have any tips for a short, mildy disabled, self-doubting but strangely calm, vicar mum-to-be, do get in touch!

More as and when...

urban v rural...?

what is it about people?

I've been living in cities and towns for much of my life and had got used to how people behave - on public transport, in shops and crowd behaviour.

For nearly 3 years now I've been living in a village - and have got used to this way of being with other people.

So it was a shock to spend 2 days on central London over New Year - sitting in the entrance hall to the British Museum, I looked at more people in 2 minutes than I see in 1 week! Not just the numbers of people amazed me - the behaviour. Nobody sees anybody else. Shop assistants look through you, crowds walk into you and then look at you as though it's your fault, everyone is preoccupied with who-knows-what, and nobody has time to engage.

It feels as though life in rural parts is about engaging and relating. Life in the city is about surviving...

Or am I going soft?

Interesting few days...

- one meeting that went well, dealt with tough issues and felt constructive and supportive; by contrast another meeting that seemed to be going well until some there became critical of me without any sense of wanting to be constructive - see how these Christians love one another.

Then we had wedding yesterday which was great fun, and a Baptism this morning with an extremely cute baby and a packed church - many of whom were morris dancers! Sadly no demonstration - I did ask...!

Why do I connect so much better with those 'outside' the church than with those 'inside'? And am I letting one group of people cloud my vision for how God sees me...? I feel as though I really am doing my best, but for some people when I fail - even a little - I must be made an example of.

happy day...

good day today, if a little tiring and wet!


it's all been about my favourite aspect of work, vocation and personality - being around children.

this morning was at a pre-schoolers' group, making musical instruments out of recycling, hearing how the boy David played music to lift the spirit of king Saul, and singing if you're happy and you know it to the sounds of toddlers and shakers!

this afternoon, spending time with two classes at a primary school watching a bit of Ice Age and then talking about bereavement and the place of funerals. and the wet part? stood in the pouring rain in the playground talking to a parent about baptism! all what i am made for...

and now i am about to sit down to a load of paperwork which i am legally obliged to care about enough to do efficiently...

administration - what would Jesus do?

the point is...?

so I have finally ventured into the world of blogging... 'T-dog' sitting on the sofa wants to know why I feel the need to have a blog. I'm not entirely sure I have a good reason! why this need to be so public? is it all about ego? what's the point of a blog anyway, and will it make me a better person...?